Love is Bliss

February 15, 2012 by  
Filed under bliss, love, relationships

Valentines Day was the other day. Did you notice?

Hard not too if you’ve walked into any store within the last month or so. Or peeked in on Facebook yesterday, as every friend was making some kind of post about it, for or against. (Most are for the whole love thing, thank goodness, just not the commercial element of it!)

The night before I had a conversation with a friend and said “wouldn’t it be awesome if people treated every day as if it were Valentine’s Day? Bringing each other chocolates and flowers and writing little love notes to show appreciation and affection to those special people in our lives?” I don’t know about you, but I much prefer to get special treats for no reason, and to be surprised by a spontaneous expression of love rather than one inspired by a Hallmark holiday.

Appreciation is a good place to start. Do you make it a regular practice to let people not only know that you appreciate them, but why? Do you hear yourself saying things like “I really appreciate the way you listen when I’m talking without interrupting, because it helps me know that you really are interested in what I have to say”, or “I appreciate the way you contribute to our group with your grounded-ness and wisdom, as it really helps us stay focused”. These little expressions show others how we value them and it sets the tone for intimacy and love to deepen.

Other ways to show appreciation are through actions……by keeping commitments with our loved ones, by being honest and acting from a place of integrity. I cooked a wonderfully simple yet delicious meal for a friend last night, which for me is a metaphor for nurturing and says I value this relationship and so nurture our relationship by nurturing you. Get creative. How can you discover new ways to show appreciation and gratitude for the people in your life that are special?

Love calls upon us to open our hearts, to be love and give love in order for love to come back to us. While it may sound narcissistic, the ability to manifest love in our lives comes from a foundation of loving ourselves. Before we are able to truly appreciate others we must be able to appreciate the incredibleness with in ourselves, and to value ourselves, right now, right here, as we are. Before we can embrace love coming towards us, we must be able to love ourselves enough to be able to send love out, unconditionally, compassionately, and with trust. Andy Dooley, a very cool dude who I have been following lately, really nails this idea in this funny and wonderful video. 

While many of us know that we might need to do things differently in our relationships, it’s not always easy to integrate this awareness into our every day lives. Sometimes it is just a matter of re-training ourselves while committing to creating positive change and transformation. They say the longest journey is from the head to the heart. Why not bring along a guide who can support you in bringing light to the dark places, who is skilled in recognizing the blocks that keep you from intimacy and connection, who has the awareness of new ways of doing things, and can train you to make that shift??

I invite you to consider the idea of hiring a skilled relationship Coach to help you on your way. You can check out my offerings here .

My heart is full with the wonder and gratitude of all the love in my life, and the many opportunities placed before me to engage in ways that serve love, to guide and support others on their path towards deeper intimacy, and to bring an alive juiciness into the world around me. Yaa love, it really is the answer to most any question.  :)

 

Blissing Out and Away

October 1, 2011 by  
Filed under bliss, personal growth, relationships, travel

mom and her two girls

WOW!! It has been a very-long-time since I have posted in my blog. Bad girl blogger, some would say. Well, to be honest, dear readers, I have been living life, and fulfilling blog writing requirements based on the latest marketing suggestions has not been my priority, rather, living, and feeling into, life has been the name of this girls games lately. 

And, a lot has happened….at the time of my last post I was on day 15 or so of a hospital bedside vigil for my mother, that lasted a total of 28 days and culminated in her passing. Don’t be dismayed, it was an incredibly powerful, profound, transforming, and enlightening time for me. The gifts she gave to me in her final days, and final breaths, are still being integrated into my spirit/soul. I wouldn’t trade that time in for anything, and I am so grateful that I have the life I do that allowed me to be there, to show up, and to have the space to put the rest of my life on hold, while I did that. That time set my life on a whole new course, brought my sister and I closer, and provided the opportunity for a master evaluation of the path I am on. I have not found all the answers. I have discovered a new perspective, and a new outlook that allows me to put aside fear, anxiety, and doubt, and move forward anyhow. 

When you sit with the womyn who has birthed you into the world, and you know that the only thing you can do is provide unconditional love to her in that moment, no matter what your history has been, and then you hold her hand while she takes her last breaths, well… it changes you. It brings home, with a whole new clarity, the idea that we can’t take a damn thing with us when we go, except the love in our hearts, and the awareness of the love we have given away. My mother waited until all of her immediate family was gathered around her, and laughing together, before she left. This spoke volumes to me and has reconnected me to the basic essentials , and elements, of life. 

And I come away with this: life is to short. Way to short. And, it can all change in an instant. Mom was living independently and just fine, at 80 yrs old. A fall, resulting in head wound, started a course of events that led to her passing. Who would have known? Who would have guessed? We must be prepared at any minute for it all to end when we least expect it. What then will we say? Will we be happy with how we have lived our life? 

Mom’s passing, and many other circumstances leading up to that time, and afterwards, has caused this just-turned-50, menopausal, life coach, laughter yoga leader, bliss-ologist, daughter, sister, communitarian, ecologist, earth/gaia girl to completely access her life and go Whoa! What are we doing here? 

The end result?  The letting go of my office. A reduction by 50% of all my belongings. The rest of it in storage. My car packed like a big suitcase. And a journey to re-discover my essence, to re-connect with my core values, and to discover the next place I am meant to be. The hope is for that to be in intentional community. I’m tired of living alone. I want to live and work and play deeply, and intimately, with people who share my values. I want to grow food and live lightly on the Earth. I want to eat, and cook, meals with others. I want to create a history with those I live with, and find support, validation, love, connection, intimacy, affirmation, encouragement, and joy an intentional part of everyday life. Life is to short. Fill it up big. Make the most of it now. Go for your dreams. Live the life you most want to live. Manifest it. Live your bliss.

It’s what I tell my clients. I need to live it too. So watch me, here I go!!

Oh, BTW, it might mean I am not here to much. Or maybe the posts will change in their focus. Or maybe I will start a whole new blog about my adventures. or maybe I will just grow food and let everything else go. Or maybe…….

 

 

 

Blissful Gratitude

Be Grateful.Wow! In this moment my heart is bursting with gratitude as I sit reflecting on all the wonderful things in my life. Mostly I am grateful for the work that I have chosen for myself. (Scroll down to see my detailed list!) Because of that, each day is a continuous opportunity to be “Living Bliss”, to practice “Getting My Bliss-ology On”, and to engage in “Bliss101”. I mean, if I’m going to advocate it, I have to be it, right? And what a gift it is!

Hey, don’t get me wrong. I have my days, and mood swings, and moments of not remembering. I’m not perfect. But as a Messenger of Bliss, I get to be constantly reminded of what choices are available to me, by my work. Some times, in those moments of darkness I hear the same words I shared with a client, and I burst out laughing. I’ve chosen many careers over my lifetime, and this one, by far, is the most fun, and the one that challenges me the most to live with integrity, purpose, passion, and authenticity. And that is an amazing gift to be uber thankful for, I think!

(Recently I interviewed a self-proclaimed “Joyologist”, Melodee Stumpf, on Bliss101Radio. We decided that when we become an honor student of Bliss-ology, we become Certified Joyologists! And, she shared about how she handles those dark days-take a listen, it’s a really fabulous interview.)

Along with the gift of my work comes many other things that I am immensely grateful for, which I’ve listed below. What are you grateful for? Are you paying attention to all the amazing things in your life? Are you sharing that gratitude?

  • Top of the list no doubt: YOU!!! Thank you for being the amazing personthat you are, for being in my life, for encouraging me to be the best I can be, just by being here. Yes, you are awesome!
  • The ability to live life on my own terms, to create and design the life of bliss I desire.
  • My dear friends who stick by me thru think and thin.
  • My Kitty-Luv, who currently is in my lap, with her head resting on my right wrist as I type this! Silly cat, doesn’t seem like a comfy way to rest, but I have to admit, that’s a look of bliss on her face. Ha! (see video on right)
  • Warm sunshine, soft wind, delicious moon-glow, starry nights, howling coyotes, sunflowers, pomegranate’s, expansive views, mountains…oh heck, all of Mama Nature!
  • Music that soothes my soul, moves my body, lifts my day, and inspires my heart. (My current fav’s: Prem Joshua and Herb Albert Tijuana Brass)
  • My Ecstatic Dance community-you dance me into Bliss!
  • Food on my plate, a warm house, a working car, things that make my life comfortable.
  • Eyes that see, hands that touch, ears that hear, a heart that feels, lungs that breath, a body that is healthy, a spirit that loves.
  • The opportunity to live yet another awesome day on this most amazing planet, with other incredible beings walking and laughing the bliss path.

How about making a gratitude list, and sharing it with your loved ones??

For me Thanksgiving is all about gratitude, and offering our thanks to the wonderful world around us. May you have an awesome Thanksgiving, surrounded by the very things that you are most thankful for.

Adding Value and Giving Thanks

Harvest Sunset

(This is a re-post from another blog I had. I share it with you today as I scurry off to the mountains and cold of Colorado to spend Thanksgiving with dear friends. May you have a marvelously abundant and joyful Thanksgiving holiday! Thanks for being a reader. )

Lately I have been pondering, and sitting with, the question of “How can I add value to your life?”. Your being the collective your; all those around me, all those I touch, have contact with, and intersect with in various ways.

As we approach the Thanksgiving holiday, a time when we naturally take stock of all the things we have to be joyfully grateful for, it’s a bit of an interesting twist. As I list my mountains of abundance that I am so thankful for, I also get to consider all the ways that I might be able to positively impact another’s life.

How can I add value to your life? Depending on who I ask will certainly influence the answer. Actually, it is not even imperative that I really ask the other person, it is a question I can ask of myself about another person. “How can I add value to so&so’s life?”.

It occurs to me, that unless those I am asking really know who I am, they may not be aware of how I may add value to their life. If, for instance, the person I asked did not know that I am a Life Coach, they wouldn’t know that I might support them in gaining clarity or in creating balance in their lives. If they know I am a Life Coach, they may not understand that my focus is on Whole Health and Wellness, especially within relationships, and that my passion is in helping others to gain a sense of complete healthiness in all aspects of their life. If they are needing respite and renewal, and didn’t know I facilitate custom designed retreats for individuals and groups, they wouldn’t know I could help them step out of their usual lives and into a safe place of stillness where their authentic voice could really be heard. Likewise, if one was unaware of my community building experience, or organizational skills, networking prowess, or love for collaborative ventures, how would they know to ask?

As we consider the possibility of adding value to lives of others, in ways that they will be thankful for, while we count our own blessings, it seems important that we let others know who we are!!

But first, we must ask ourselves…how do I value myself? In what ways can I add value to my own life? What aspects of myself do I believe adds value to the lives of others? Believing in ourselves and trusting that we have something of value to contribute to the world at large, and knowing what that is, is as important as wanting to make a positive impact.

Sometimes we are not always able to connect to our intrinsic value and positive contribution to the world. Hopefully, this is when our friends and loved ones take notice, and ask us how they can add value to our lives! And then, we get to count our blessings and have give thanks and the circle continues.

Today, I am grateful for many, many things, and I ask: how can I add value to your life?